Ten Ways to Avoid Divorce

How to Avoid Divorce

Divorce rates are considerably higher than they have ever been in the history of marriage. There are many factors responsible for the reality that many people simply do not take the steps to avoid a divorce. If you are married and have just heard those dreaded words from your spouse, it’s time to take action if you want to save your marriage from divorce court.
There are probably just as many scatterbrained schemes as there are reasonable and realistic options that you can use to put your marriage back together. This means you have to be aware of ideas that seem too good to be true and to put your focus on choices that you can put into action.

1. Avoid denial. We understand that you’re in shock and the natural reaction may be to want to deny that your spouse wants a divorce. Don’t deny the truth hoping it will just go away and everything will be okay. You need to take action and the first action is to accept that there’s a problem so that you can set about working to resolve it.

2. Assess yourself. This may sound contrary if you are not the one asking for a divorce but an evaluation of yourself is a good way to start looking at what factors may have caused a divorce to come up. Are you the same size as when you were married or have you put on weight and let your appearance slip? Do you take the time to make yourself attractive to your spouse or do you take them for granted. Sometimes divorce can be the result of failing to take care of ourselves which directly impacts how your mate feels about you.

3. Evaluate your marriage. This is extremely important because it is your marriage that is on the line. Have you been happy with your spouse or have the two of you been fighting like a cat and dog? Is there any romance or do you simply have sex as a ritual? When do you spend quality time together without the kids, the dog, the cell phones and the laptops? Understanding what the present state of your marriage has been for the last few months or even years can be a starting point in trying to save your marriage by resurrecting romance, passion, fun and togetherness.

4. Consider marriage counseling. Sometimes the threat of divorce is a cry for help. Your spouse may be dealing with some frustrations and be at their wits end because they’ve tried talking to you and you haven’t listened. Marriage counseling allows both partners to speak about the condition of the relationship and the problems being encountered, all within the help of a marriage counselor who can try to help sort things out.

5. Take an intimacy break. As strange as it may sound, the announcement of a divorce may trigger certain feelings in one or both spouses that are highly aroused and spontaneously filled with unbridled passion. The problem is that these hot moments are not a substitute and it’s very possible that you will find your spouse even more unreasonable afterwards due to feeling manipulated or used.

6. Try praying. No matter what your religious beliefs are, you can try to start out with simple prayer that places your needs before the Creator.

7. Don’t belittle yourself. Once you are over the denial, you may want to beg, cry or threaten your spouse to get them to agree that a divorce is not necessary. This will only make you feel worse when you discover you cannot make them do what you want.

8. Have a lunch meeting just to talk. Try to pick one of your favorite dining spots and agree to meet just to talk. Take the time to listen to what your spouse has to say. The key may be in the words they share with you. Don’t resort to finger pointing or spiteful comments as they will only cause more damage.

9. Express yourself in writing. Sometimes the best way to deal with our feelings is to put them in writing. Saving your marriage may be the same thing. Sit down and write a letter to your spouse and explain how you feel about them, why you want your marriage to work and what you believe the two of you have to look forward to together.

10. Use your heart and mind. Your heart is a brilliant emotional tool. Let it guide you to the positive feelings you

Your Best Way to a Quick Divorce

Quick Divorce

In the event that you are thinking about a fast separation and divorce, then you probably would like to get far from your spouse as quickly as possible. Lots of partners who’re thinking about separation and divorce are often around the stage associated with quarreling over the littlest difficulties. Bickering is actually continuous. The actual adoration which was at the time presently there appears missing. When it’s apparent that the partnership is beyond solution, then a swift divorce proceeding is actually the thing you need.
Before you decide to act rashly, there are some great methods for getting a fast divorce proceeding. Here are some ideas to assist you in finding the proper way to a fast finalizing of divorce proceeding documents.

There are plenty of individuals available who’ll benefit from a person’s desire to have a fast breakup. Numerous “legal experts” have advertisements within tabloids proclaiming to offer you a very speedy as well as low-cost divorce case. These people guarantee top quality assistance with regard to costs which range from $150-$300. After that you will find all those internet separation and divorce sites that provide a person all of the advantages of a normal divorce in the convenience of your home. Internet separation and divorce solutions provide a surprisingly low cost (often below $1000) and you need not head over to the courtroom even once. There is something typical regarding many of these providers. Many of them are phony.

These strategies to obtaining a speedy breakup prevent plenty of legalized methods. This is the reason the particular finalizing is really quick. Whilst this may allow you to really feel great due to the fact it is low-cost as well as speedy, there are plenty of long term issues that may come up out of this. Many people which have employed one of these simple quick-fixes currently have wound up having problems with govt assistance after wards. The reason being as far as information saved within govt directories, they are officially still wedded. In spite of getting authorized divorce case documents, the truth is you cannot always be assured of your high quality divorce proceeding should you prefer these types of options.

For this reason if you prefer a fast separation and divorce which is concrete, It might be recommended to employ a great divorce case attorney and also figure out the facts together with your wife or husband. When the both of you can easily achieve an agreement by means of discussion, a lawyer can iron out your legal aspects for you personally. You will be away from your marital life right away. Additionally, you should the advantage of an assurance towards difficulties relating to your breakup later on.

A good expedient divorce proceeding does not have to compromise top quality. This simply requires a chunk of compromise as well as great choices to turn the actual dream of an instant divorce proceeding right into an actuality.

How to Retain Custody of Your Child or Children During Divorce

When filing for divorce, one of the most challenging parts of the process is not splitting property or separating accounts. It’s deciding who will have custody of the child or children. Highly contested custody cases can ultimately harm the child or children involved. And, sometimes, courts may act to bar one parent from having regular contact and limit their input on their own child’s upbringing. Losing the ability to be a positive influence in your child or children’s life can be scary to a parent; however don’t lose hope. Here are some tips on how to retain custody of your children in a divorce.

Types of Custody

When a child is born, biological parents each have custody of their child. No order is truly necessary as long as the parents work together to raise their child; however, custody has many aspects.

Physical custody of a child means that the child lives in the home with a parent. Legal custody relates to the ability of parents to make decision, such as educational, religious influences, and medical treatment, regarding the child. Having sole custody means that one parent can make all decisions. Having shared or joint custody allows both parents to have input.

Many folks confuse visitation with custody, but visitation is not the same. Visitation allows one parent, who is the child does not live with, to have access. Visitation can be in-person, on the phone or even through virtual means. The intent of this form of parent-child contact helps foster a healthy relationship with the non-custodial parent.

General Considerations

When a court awards physical custody to one parent over another, the court has made a determination that the child is better suited in one parent’s home or household versus the other parent’s home or household. The court will consider financial stability, emotional stability, familial supports, educational opportunities, and even the comments and desires of the child.

When a parent does not obtain physical custody, the court is not often saying the parent is a bad parent. The judge is basically deciding that the other parent can better provide for the child.

Best Interest of the Child

Any decision about a child, whether it’s custody or visitation, is govern by the precept of “best interest.” Children are young, impressionable and need a positive healthy home environment. Courts, sometimes with the help of Guardian ad litems, seek to make sure that the parental home can provide for the child’s physical as well as emotional needs.

The Process

In seeking a custody change, a parent can file a petition for custody with the appropriate family court (juvenile and domestic) in their area. Once the petition or motion is filed, the court will set a hearing date.

During that hearing, whether represented by counsel or not, the parent seeking custody should be prepared to present evidence, not just opinion, in support of their request to amend their custody arrangement and order. In presenting evidence, the parent should have documentation to offer and witnesses to testify.

What to Prove

In gaining custody of your child, a parent must offer the court information about the parent child relationship, the parent’s ability to provide a safe, stable home, and a parent’s ability to help their child have a continuing positive relationship with their other parent.

A parent seeking custody can offer pay stubs to prove job stability, have family members and friends come speak about their parenting styles, or even call a minister to testify as to activities that their family or children are involved. While tooting one’s horn is never harmful, a parent seeking to retain custody must demonstrate to the court that they are very involved and active in their child’s general care and future plans. Some examples of things a parent may want to show a judge can include the fact that they volunteer at their child’s school, take their child to doctor’s appointments, and even read them a story every night.

While the parental relationship may be strained, a parent seeking custody must show their willingness to co-parent and their ability to set aside their personal feelings to ensure that their child visits with their other parent. In those cases where the other parent has been disinterested, violent or negative toward the child, a court must consider this evidence. In those cases, a parent may not need to push their child into a continuing relationship which may be emotionally harmful to them.

When it comes to child custody cases, there are no real winners or losers. Children suffer when they are drawn into conflicts between their parents, but conscientious parents know will want what’s best for their children and not use a custody battle as a means of harassing the other parent. Seeking to obtain or regain custody of a child or children can be successful as long as the parent is motivated by the needs of their child or children.

How to Select a West Virginia Divorce Lawyer

West Virginia Divorce Lawyer

Walking into a divorce without a lawyer sometimes feels like walking into a West Virginia coal mine without a gas mask. Divorce laws are quite complex, and using them to your advantage takes years of trial practice and experience. This is the value of getting a West Virginia divorce lawyer.
While not all people can afford a lawyer for their divorce, everyone can at least contact some local attorneys for a free divorce consultation. And if you do decide that you need and can afford an attorney, then you should learn some basic tips about how to find the right lawyer for your WV divorce case.

First, you should compile divorce-related information that you might be able to use in court. In addition to information about the private aspects of your relationship, all financial matters can become relevant. This includes income, premarital assets and marital assets.

The other big area you need to be thinking about is parenting. In West Virginia divorce cases, the judge can decide child support, child custody and parenting time. Indeed, this is one of the most hotly contested areas in contested divorce cases. Get all of this information into a file before you start consulting with attorneys.

Now that you are armed with the right information, look for the website links in the Resources section to find sites that have lists of West Virginia divorce lawyers. Both sites list the attorneys by county, and FindLaw also lists them by city. You want to find a local lawyer where you live because family law attorneys in your area will know how to navigate the local court system.

When speaking to lawyers or negotiating a representation agreement, go with a lawyer who seems to care about your concerns. Some divorce lawyers treat you more like a number than a real person. If you are going to be uncomfortable around an attorney, then go ahead and find another one.

Legal fees vary from lawyer to lawyer and even client to client for the same divorce lawyer. Those with more money naturally end up getting more services, which can get way too expensive for the average West Virginian. So the last thing you need to do is establish a plan for paying your divorce attorney.

This means you may have to pick and choose what you want your lawyer to do, as doing everything possible in a contested divorce suit can be overly expensive. Most of all, remember that you are the boss, so pick a lawyer who is willing to abide by your wishes as to the scope of representation and budget that you set (within reason).


West Virginia Divorce Lawyers (FindLaw)

StateLawyers Lists of Specialty West Virginia Attorneys

How to Pick an Arkansas Divorce Lawyer

Arkansas Divorce Lawyer

Trying to get through a tough divorce without an Arkansas lawyer can be like fighting a wild razorback with your bare hands. Divorce attorneys have the requisite knowledge of Arkansas divorce laws and the life experience to advise and assist you on issues related to court filings, division of property, divorce-related support issues and child custody matters.
All parties who are or anticipate filing or being served divorce papers should first learn how to hunt down Arkansas divorce lawyers for consultations. If an attorney is needed, the parties should then know how to assess a lawyer and negotiate for the best deal under the circumstances of each case.

To find attorneys in your area, go to the Resources links below. The first one is for FindLaw, a site that has legal resources, including lists of lawyers throughout the United States based on specialties. Pick your city or county name on the list and then look at the list to find local attorneys. Similarly, StateLawyers provides specialty-based lists of attorneys in the United States, including Arkansas divorce lawyers. Click on your county and select the “Divorce” specialty to find local attorneys.

Another way to hunt down local attorneys is by using the county bar association. Not all counties necessarily have one of these, but those that do will either provide you a list of divorce attorneys in your Arkansas county or use a lawyer referral service to hook you up with a lawyer. Note that some of these services may charge a consultation fee, whereas you generally do not pay a fee if finding a lawyer on your own.

When you do call and then meet up with these lawyers, be honest from the outset about what you want to accomplish through your divorce and the finances you have to pay for it. Some lawyers may actually decline your offer, as lawyers and law firms do charge different rates and have different preferences.

So what you are trying to do is find an Arkansas divorce lawyer that wants to do the type and amount of work you request for the amount of money that you offer. This could be difficult if you are lowballing your offer. In the end, only you can decide whether what you will receive from getting a lawyer is worth the price you have to pay.


Arkansas Divorce Lawyers FindLaw Directory

Arkansas Divorce Attorneys StateLawyers Lists

How to Select an Oklahoma Divorce Lawyer

Oklahoma Divorce Lawyer

Oklahoma divorces can be done either uncontested (generally without an attorney) or contested with or without a lawyer. Of course, if there are big issues in dispute that the parties cannot resolve, that increases the need for an Oklahoma divorce lawyer to navigate the pitfalls of complex state divorce laws and court procedures.
Whether you choose to get a lawyer or not to get a divorce in Oklahoma, a good starting point is to at least consult with a lawyer about the big issues and concerns surrounding your divorce. Important things to consider are your reasons for getting a divorce and what you expect to gain from this situation.

An example would be child custody. Occasionally, parents have big disagreements about how to raise a child. Most parents would consider this issue far more important than merely who is getting the house or how much someone can get in alimony. If it is vital in your mind that you get custody of the kids, that may be worth getting an Oklahoma divorce lawyer even if you have trouble paying your legal fees.

Sometimes, if you press hard enough on a lawyer during negotiations, you can get a special fee structure. The more important and urgent the matter is, the more likely you can get at least some temporary legal help from a lawyer.

Even if you are wealthy, legal fees can become astronomical if you do not keep your attorney on a tight leash. Have an agreement in writing that your lawyer must give regular updates of all legal fees accrued up to that point. You can even set a specific amount over which the attorney is not allowed to bill.

To find the right divorce attorney, consider how well you get along with and communicate with the lawyer. Remember that communication is a two-way street. To get good communication, you need to give it, as well. Comply with all requests for information and anything else the lawyer needs to help you in your divorce case.

It is easy nowadays to find OK divorce lawyers in your area. Use the website links below to visit databases of Oklahoma family law attorneys. For FindLaw, just select your Oklahoma county or local city name. For the StateAttorneys website, click on your county name to find the list of lawyer specialties. You will find a “Divorce” link on that page to access a list of attorneys in your OK county.


FindLaw Oklahoma Divorce Lawyers

StateAttorneys OK Attorney Lists By Specialty


Selecting a Connecticut Divorce Lawyer

Connecticut Divorce Lawyer

Connecticut divorces run the gamut from super-simple uncontested divorces to knock-down, drag-out court battles. The kind of divorce you want to get still does not really change the fact that you should get the advice of a Connecticut divorce lawyer. Only a lawyer will know your full set of rights under Connecticut divorce laws.
Even if you have no money to pay an attorney to handle your divorce, it is still possible to glean information from free consultations. At least you will have the peace of mind that comes from a lawyer’s advice on your trial strategy. You can often get this kind of information for free if you go to a consultation armed with the proper information.

To prepare yourself to start meeting lawyers in your area, get all relevant information together to present at the consultations. Everything related to household finances, including incomes of both you and your spouse and assets acquired both before and after the marriage. If you have children, then any hopes or desires you have relative to child support or child custody should also be discussed. CT divorce lawyers can litigate these children issues at the the divorce hearings.

You also want to start thinking about what you want to achieve during this divorce. So many times, people get to focusing on getting even or trying to make the other party look bad. But if you have children together, you cannot expect to get sole custody unless your spouse has done something to harm the children. So also think about the long-term potential effects of a divorce if you are thinking of trying to play hardball.

Probably the most important things are to find a lawyer who has a willingness to help you get what you want but within the pre-defined budget constraints that you set for the entire divorce. Come right out during negotiations and say you absolutely cannot spend more than the maximum price for legal fees that you set.

There is not much sense in selecting a Connecticut divorce lawyer unless the two of you can agree on the cost of the representation. So get this in writing before you hire an attorney.

Get all of the relevant information and then use the links in the Resources below to start finding CT divorce lawyers. Make a list and contact the ones in your city or county. Get as much free advice as possible and hire a lawyer only if what you have to gain is worth the price a lawyer agrees to pay.


FindLaw Connecticut Divorce Lawyers

StateLawyers CT Divorce Attorneys

How to Select a Maryland Divorce Lawyer

Maryland Divorce Lawyer

Like all states, the divorce laws and court procedures of Maryland are rather complex and difficult to grasp for an inexperienced layperson. While the law does allow individuals to file for and litigate divorce cases without an attorney, most people should consult with a Maryland divorce lawyer before making this decision.
Lots of factors go into a successful litigation of a MD divorce case. For example, what do you even say if you want child custody? What is necessary to qualify for Maryland alimony? How does a parent get a court order for child support? All of these things are relevant to a Maryland divorce, and only an experienced Maryland divorce lawyer is usually going to have the knowledge to guide you through all of the possibilities.

You also want a sympathetic and caring attorney who is actually interested in helping you. Many one-person law firms lack the resources of the large firms but have a great sense of caring and concern for your interests and well being. This may be more important to you than getting an esteemed Maryland divorce attorney that treats you more like a case number than a human being.

Finances are also key when selecting a MD divorce lawyer. Some firms may charge hundreds of dollars for one hour of work, while other divorce attorneys will work with you by placing a cap or some other similar provision in their legal fee structure.

Unfortunately, not everyone can afford a high-class lawyer for their divorce. But the most important thing is probably just seeing eye to eye with your attorney over legal fees and how to litigate your divorce case.

There are many ways to find a Maryland divorce lawyer or family law attorney. Some online websites have lists of lawyers. Some examples (links can be found in the Resources below) are FindLaw and StateLawyers. Use those sites to find divorce attorneys in your MD county. It is generally best to choose a county attorney because experience in that county can help with navigating local court rules and procedures.

You can also try to find legal representation through your county’s bar association (if one exists). These associations are made up of local lawyers, and you can usually get a referral to a Maryland family law attorney through one of these associations.


FindLaw Maryland Divorce Lawyer Lists

StateLawyers MD Divorce Attorney Database

How to Get a Minnesota Divorce Lawyer

Minnesota Divorce Lawyer

As divorce has risen over the past few decades, it is increasingly important to learn how to protect yourself and preserve legal rights in the event of a divorce. In Minnesota, you can file the papers by yourself and litigate an entire divorce case. However, this is not necessarily the best idea. Divorce laws and court rules and procedures are very complex. It is nice to have an experienced Minnesota divorce lawyer at your side, especially when you have important disputes like child custody still left unresolved.
So before you rush to the courthouse to file those divorce papers or respond to a notice of divorce, you should take the time to learn how to find and consult with MN divorce attorneys. You can then decide for yourself whether it is better to proceed on your own or hire the services of a family attorney for your Minnesota divorce.

There are a few ways to find a lawyer in your area to consult about your divorce issues. For example, there are two links in the Resources below. They lead to FindLaw and StateLawyers, sites that have databases of Minnesota divorce attorneys. These lists are divided by county.

Normally, you want to focus your search on the county where the divorce is or will be taking place. This is because, although MN attorneys have a state license, they generally work in a specific county. Family law attorneys in your county will be most familiar with how to file court documents and deal with the habits and preferences of local judges in your Minnesota county.

You can also look for Minnesota county bar associations to search for lawyers. These associations will generally refer you to local specialists in Minnesota divorce law.

After finding some lawyers in your area, make a consultation appointment and start sharing your story. The more you tell, the more help you can get from a lawyer. Honesty is the best policy here. Depending on your personal financial situation, you may have to tailor a plan to limit the activities of an attorney.

An aggressive approach to Minnesota divorce litigation could lead to tens of thousands of dollars in costs. This is obviously not feasible for all individuals, so you need to discuss these things with any lawyers with whom you consult and negotiate.

In the end, pick a lawyer who sympathizes with your situation and needs and agrees to do exactly as you wish for the amount of money you are willing to pay. It is important to iron out these issues before litigation begins to avoid problems during the middle of divorce proceedings.


FindLaw: Minnesota Divorce Lawyers

StateLawyers: MN Divorce Attorney Lists

How to Get a Massachusetts Divorce Lawyer

Massachusetts Divorce Lawyer

Massachusetts divorce laws are not easy to understand. While it is certainly possible to file the papers or respond to a divorce petition without a Massachusetts divorce lawyer, this is not advisable. At the very least, you want to discuss matters with a local attorney before proceeding with a divorce. Issues such as child custody, child support, spousal support, parenting time and division of property are all relevant to a divorce case. Discuss these matters with a MA divorce lawyer to protect your rights.
On the other hand, not all lawyers are a good fit for you. Well-established law firms, for example, may be less likely to want to take a small case than Massachusetts family attorneys that work alone. Some divorce lawyers or firms cater to the rich, while others cater to those on a small legal budget.

For this reason, when you do start consulting with lawyers, you will want to know how much money you have to hire a lawyer and how much and what kind of work you want that divorce lawyer to do. There are several possible approaches that a Massachusetts divorce lawyer can take when litigating a case. The full-scale approach could cost over $100,000 in some cases, and family law attorneys typically charge by the hour. If you do not have this kind of money to begin with, then you obviously need to discuss this before hiring a MA divorce lawyer.

Once you feel you have the information to start negotiating with lawyers, then it’s time to start looking for them. Other than simply asking around town for a referral, you can also use some online databases to initiate your lawyer search.

In the Resources section, you can see a FindLaw link. This link leads to a website that has a database of Massachusetts divorce attorneys. Just click on your county’s name in the selections to find a list of local attorneys. StateLawyers has a similar database. To use that website, click on the link for attorneys, choose your county and then click on the section for your MA county’s divorce lawyers.

Start calling lawyers and discussing your divorce problems. Choose a lawyer that understands and sympathizes with your financial situation. This is the best way to get what you want out of your divorce while maintaining a relationship of trust with your lawyer.


Massachusetts Divorce Lawyers List at FindLaw Website

MA Divorce Attorneys at StateLawyers